Realizations

So the past few weeks I have realized a few things and now need to focus in a new direction.

Realization #1: Single = Good
For 12 of the past 14 years, I have been in (what I thought were) serious, committed relationships. I think it is quite ok that I am single right now.

Realization #2: Find the Boys
I can't meet guys (to hang out with - not date) if I don't go anywhere.

Realization #3: Friends
I have to stop waiting around for people to invite me out and start inviting them out. However, I have realized that there are a bunch of great friends who are always here for me.

Realization #4: Guy-Dar
Jason DID cheat on me and now he is dating her. That makes 100% of all the guys I ever dated. My guy radar is apparently faulty.

Realization #5: Smaller Thighs
I have actually been working out less since I got Niko. I went from doing 3-6 miles a day on my treadmill to between 1-2 miles a day jogging with Niko outside. However, my thighs and waist have gotten smaller and I am now in pants I haven't been in for over a year. No weight loss though.

Realization #6: Regrets
I regret almost everything that happened in the last 5 years. Jason informed me today that he is going to stop paying the mortgage and let it go into foreclosure.....

Realization #7: Motivation
There is no reason to mope about how I don't like something. If I want a different life, I have to make it. That gives me all the motivation that I need to do the right things.


I Sazzle because even though it hurt to hear he cheated, I am not sad but feel validated. I wasn't the crazy, paranoid girlfriend - but had good instinct. Next time I am going to listen to myself.

Halloween and Stuff

Apparently my blogging has now become a weekly event instead of a daily event. Still trying to create the proper work/life/Niko balance.

While there have been a few rough things I have been going through, I am choosing not to blog about them. Why allow negative influences affect my time more than they have to? I am going to only discuss the good things.

First: Isn't she the cutest dog ever? So happy to be with her Mommy!

Changing it Up:
I have worn red nail polish - exclusively for at least 3 years now. They are ALWAYS painted red. Any time I attempt to try another color, I think it looks awful. Maybe I need a change? I painted them black (well, a VERY dark purple). What do you think? Keeper or go back to red?

New Toy Drama:
I got Niko a few new toys. One is this cute ball...that she proceeded to eat in about 5 minutes:

and I found pieces all over the apartment...






I also went and got Niko some Christmas gifts at PetSmart. However, Niko took the bag of toys off of my office chair and took all the toys out. So, I guess I have to buy her all new toys. Here is the toy aftermath. Someone spoiled?

However, there has been a beautiful new addition to the family. Everyone: Meet Huff:

He gets the same treatment as everyone else.

Halloween was fun at work - check out some of the pics:

Me and Yoda (Kate)

IT Chris dressed up as 2-Face. He made the costume himself and even cut half of his hair the night before!

Angela as the devil and Kristen as an angel. Fitting? :)








Halloween Night:
No bar hopping with slutty outfits for me. I hung out with Kirsti and Brandon. Interview with the Vampire, Shaun of the Dead, and more cheese fondue and candy than anyone can consume in one setting. There were only a few trick or treaters, but we had a great time.

Noah begging me to take this off him. :)

Very scary Brandon...very, very scary...

Candy eyeballs :)

Fun Times Had by All

So, I need to blog about some other stuff, but I need to tend to Niko right now. Sort of an emergency. I will blog later.

Niko Has a Boyfriend

Niko met a boy tonight and I am so happy for her!

I was a good Mommy and took her for a jog in the rain. As we came back soaking wet and tired, we ran into a guy (Mark) and his dog, Sammy.

Sammy looks like a yellow lab with the back coloring of a German Shephard. He is a shephard/lab/husky mix and so pretty - and big! He is really tall!!!

Well, Niko and Sammy fell in love. Come to find out, Sammy is only a month older than Niko so they are at the same developmental stage. I unleashed Niko and the two chased each other like they were best friends. Mark even gave Niko a treat (he had been carrying groceries).

Then, Mark showed me a little trail off of Kent Trails where apparently the owners of the big dogs take their "children" to run without leashes. Sort of an under-ground dog park for the big kids - right in my back yard. While we were walking there and back, Sammy and Niko were running, chasing, and playing. I have never seen her happier.

So glad I was a good Mommy and took her jogging in the rain! I Sazzle!

Side note: yes, Mark is cute...and I know where he lives :) We shall see if we run into them again...strictly for Niko and Sammy, of course :)

Urine Collection Part 2

Sigh.

The vet called today and informed me that Niko probably drank too much water before I collected her first urine sample. It was too deluted.

What does that mean? Oh friends, that means I have the JOY of collecting another sample... However, this should be the last sample. I am to bring Niko in with the sample right after I collect it. If it is still too weak, they can draw a bit of blood and compare some numbers. That should be able to prove whether or not she has kidney disease.

Game Plan:
Next Saturday we will sleep in. YAY!
As soon as we get up, we will collect pee (I think I will go back and get another tray and gloves)
Then, we will hop in the car and go to the vet
Hopefully the whole thing won't take that long. They can test the sample in 20 minutes.

I Sazzle because I'm not freaking out that I need to collect another sample. I am a good Mommy. Keep your fingers crossed!!!

Adventures with Sazzle and Squeakers

Oh where to start, where to start?

This first week with Niko has been quite busy and full of ups and downs. I now understand how busy a single mother's life is...and I get to leave Niko home by herself!!! Here is a little look into our adventures:

Adventures with Puffy:

Thankfully, Puffy is still alive...

...despite the fact there is a lot of this:

...and this:

...and this:

Adventures in Everyday Life:

We have quite the set schedule.
5:30am wake up
6am go jogging/walking
6:45am play with Puffy
7am I get in the shower (on Tuesday she still wanted to play when I got in the shower - so she threw her pink ball into the shower...scared the crap out of me!)
7:45 while I am finishing getting ready for work - I bore Niko so she climbs in my bed and goes back to sleep. I feel like she is teasing me - "Thanks for the jog Mom - now can you please shut the lights off and leave?"
5:30pm get home from work.
6pm go jogging/walking
6:45 relax and make dinner
7-10 the 3 hours I have to get everything done and also play with her

***Obviously I go nowhere and thus, dating will remain as it currently is - non-existent

Adventures in Dieting:

Poor thing is on a diet. Therefore, I now measure her food. It is interesting to see that sometimes the food is gone in a second and other times she barely touches it all day. I think she wonders if I am mad at her because I'm not giving her (as much) people food.

Side note: Niko does NOT like carrots :)

Adventures in Backpacking:

I bought Niko a backpack. The reason? I don't feel like holding keys, cellphone, poop bags, etc... while we are walking. Actually, it is awful when we are jogging. If I wear a cross-body purse- it hits my back. So, I figured - Niko can do it. I spent a pretty penny on it. But, doesn't it look cute?

Do you notice the nervous smile? Yep - she hates it. Although, she did let me put it on 3 times with some coaxing.

Unfortunately, the backpack is getting returned to the store. It shifts on her body when we are walking. I am trying to come up with a better plan.

Adventures in Meeting "Friends":

Niko doesn't have any dog friends and I think she really wants them. She gets really excited when she sees other dogs. She about knocks me over trying to get to them. Crazy enough, when she finally gets side by side with them, she often "hides" behind my legs because she is a bit scared. Here are some of the "friends" she has ran into in the last week:

Jazzy: the neighbors below me got a baby English Bull Dog. She is SO cute - but Niko thinks Jaz is invading our home. (Niko thinks the WHOLE apartment building is ours)
April: the weirdo neighbor's yellow lab - who is never on a leash. Niko wanted to play but I really don't trust this dog - seems a bit crazy. Plus, I want to stay away from the weirdo.
2 Golden Retreivers (at the vet): They didn't have any interest in Niko's existence. Their owner wanted me to keep Niko as far from them as possible. JERK. Aren't dog lovers supposed to like other dog lovers?
2 Pittbulls on the trail: Came out of the trailor park with their owners. From a distance, I became a bit nervous. Obviously, you can't trust a book by its cover as these were the nicest dogs and owners I have run into in the last week.
2 Very Pretty well-groomed dogs in the parking lot - one a lab and one a cocker spaniel: Again, can't judge a book by its cover. The owners were dressed very well with expensive accessories. However, their dogs were EVIL. The lab-mix was snarling at Niko. Not barking or growling - snarling. Then, of course, the expensively-dressed woman started hitting him and screaming....her and her boyfriend glared (as though I wasn't allowed in "their" parking lot). Niko gave me a concerned look, ignored the dogs and we walked off. Take that :)
Maya: Oh Maya! My favorite so far. Niko met her tonight. Maya was off her leash. The girls loved each other. For a minute, Niko hid behind my leg - not that she was scared, but more like she was nervous to meet such a calm, sweet dog. I assumed the dog was a 6-month old lab. Nope. She is a mutt and is 3-4 years old - but looks like a young black lab. Niko was so happy and I am so proud of her. She made a true friend tonight.

Adventures at the Vet...Again

When Niko went to the vet last week, they asked me if I wanted this special test done. It isn't necessary, but it is a blood test to check everything. While it is $40 - I told them to do it because I wanted to make sure she was completely checked. Unfortunately, that test showed a bit of an abnormality. There is a possibility that she has kidney disease. Very scary...very, very scary. (Some may think it isn't a big deal - but she is my baby) I am not going to dwell - I get the results soon.

So, I got Niko into the vet on Thursday. In order to check for kidney disease, they need to do a urinalysis. For that, they obviously need urine. She would NOT pee for me and the vet tech. Picture this, me and some blond girl following Niko around in the rain trying to get her to pee. Not the most fun I have ever had. However, she did get her nails done.

Of course - she was just as bad as the first time. This time, my feet were wet from the rain and the floor was wet. Niko basically had me ice-skating across the floor. Boy, I look like a GREAT dog owner...

...if they can't get her to pee at the office - how do we get it? Well, dear friends, that means that it is Mommy's job to collect. Unfortunately, I am Mommy. They gave me a clear, plastic tray and gloves and sent me on my way....yep...

Do you know what 4 people told me to use? This:

Adventures in Pee Collection:

Today I was a bit stressed about getting pee all over me. I had every bad situation running through my head. I was picturing her kicking it and having it spill all over me and my face. Gross...

I am happy to report that it went more perfect than I could have imagined. I got home from work and then put on the gloves, grabbed a plastic bag and took her outside. She dropped to pee and I easily slid it under her before she began peeing. I actually had to pull it back because she almost filled it. Then, I put the tray in the ziplock bag, put her in the apartment, and brought it to the vet. Perfect. No pee on me. Thankfully :)

No...there are no pictures or videos - even though I was asked by a large group of people to have record of it.

Adventures in Sleeping:

I have slept better in the last week than I have in the last year. Thank you Niko - Mommy needed you. However, it is a good thing I don't have a boyfriend/husband - her and I take up the whole bed.

Adventures with Me:

I have been really happy.
I bought a daily devotional and started reading it each day.
My stress level is pretty low.
I cuddle with my baby each day.
Did I mention that even though I am a crazy pet owner - I feel like myself again?
I AM ok by myself...now that she is with me :) Is that still being co-dependent?

I don't know what will happen tomorrow (kidney disease or no kidney disease) nor do I know what is going to happen in the future. However, each day is a new adventure and things will happen when they are supposed to. Squeaks and I will handle whatever comes at us.

I Sazzle because I am a FANTASTIC urine collector :)

Not Doing it Tomorrow - But it WILL Happen

The 5K is tomorrow morning. I'm not doing it. Please don't judge - there are very valid reasons.

My first 5K has to be done RIGHT. There have been a few things that have gotten in my way.

• With Niko, the schedule of early morning walks is tiring - it has taken until Friday for me not to be exhausted all day long. New schedules require a lot of work
• While Niko and I are walking enough to exhaust her - we haven't been running a lot. Poor girl is fat and doesn't have the endurance yet
• We are jogging/running more and more each day - but neither one of us is used to running like that outside so we are both adjusting
• I haven't compensated by getting on the treadmill - she is scared of it - plus I am so happy to be with her that we have cuddled a TON
• I have had a cold all week - and tonight I am running a slight fever. I am afraid of what tomorrow will bring
• Until yesterday I was getting massive shin splints each time I ran. It is getting better now. Conditioning

The most important thing is that I am NOT running very much since Niko came. Not enough. It is going to take some time to get used to everything. I want to REALLY celebrate my first 5K. This one would be an embarrassment. But, Niko and I HAVE to walk/run/jog outside. By the spring, we will be more conditioned and I will be proud to run the 5K.  Perhaps the whole reason is that I am competitive and know that I wouldn't have a competitive performance.

...and...nobody else is doing the run anymore.

BUT - MARK MY WORDS - I WILL DO IT before the end of 2010.

Most Sazzlerific Weekend Ever!

Ok folks - going to get a bit sappy for a second. Please bare with me. I have been so happy this weekend that I have been teary-eyed. My life is so much better with Niko here. She makes me feel like myself again. I can't explain it, but having her here makes everything ok. My stress seems to have completely melted away.

Ok...done with the sappy-ness/mess...onto the fun stuff. This weekend totally Sazzled!!!

Friday Sazzled:

• I didn't work. That Sazzled :)
• Niko is ALL caught up on shots. I know she is in good health and know what I need to do to get her in better health
• Dinner with Angela rocked! A couple of shots and talking to the guitar player was fun!
• Here is a picture of us at Dane before it started.

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  DANE COOK ROCKED!!! Did I mention that I was at the stage when he entered and exited? Look at how close we were!!!
  
  
  

• 
  
  After Dane, Angela and I met up with Tami and her husband as Z's. I embarrassed myself and thought some other dude was Tami's husband...but apparently didn't look anything like him...Angela had a good laugh.
  
  
  
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  Here is a pic of Tami and me. Her camera rocks! I was glad I could give her the eye mask I promised her a few months ago.
  
  
  

• Friday night I didn't get lost going home - which is quite an accomplishment as I get lost very easy. Someone once told me: "Stephanie can get lost in a box" which is sadly probably true :)

Saturday Sazzled:

• Niko and I walked Kent Trails for excercise and to practice more on the leash. Before she moved in with me she had only been on a leash a couple of times. I think her progress is doing pretty well. Funny enough, I am trying to get her to understand her commands outside of the apartment. In the apartment, she will sit, lay down, shake, speak and roll over easily. Once you get her outside, she becomes deaf and doesn't listen. So, I have been playing this game that when she sits outside (after a lot of coaxing) we can run really fast. However, now every time I say "good girl" she now wants to sprint. When she walks slowly next to me I say good girl and she speeds up. Perhaps she needs a treat when she sits instead. :)
• I was complaining to mom about the stuff I have to carry when I am walking Niko - cellphone, keys, poop bags, etc... Then I realized that it would be easy to just get Niko a backpack. What do you all think?
• Here is a pic of Niko walking the trails. Do you see how happy she is?

• Abby came over for movie night. It was a blast! We watched The Proposal - which she actually didn't hate! Then, she made me watch Boondock Saints. Sort of a weird movie - but quite good and I recommend it to everyone that likes a bit of blood and action. Love spending time with Abby! Plus, she spoils Niko. Last night Niko got sunflower seats, pizza crust, and wings. She was in HEAVEN with the chicken. Normally she drools over popcorn but she wouldn't touch it because we had chicken wings. You should have seen her grab the wing out of Abby's hand (Abby was going to let her nibble but Niko grabbed the whole thing)...and then Abby had to reach her hand into Niko's mouth to grab it back out. It was quite funny. We stayed up until almost 4am and Abby had to work in the morning...ooops!
• Here is a pic of Niko and me that Abby took. Have you seen anyone ever so happy?

Sunday Sazzled:

• Sunday was less about "getting stuff accomplished" and more "create a checklist for the things I want to accomplish this week". The list is coming along nicely :)
• Niko and I took 2 long walks on Kent Trails. She loved it. It is so funny to see how excited she gets when I say "do you want to go on a walk".
• Rest, rest, rest and relaxation :)
• Funny story: A squirrel climbed onto my balcony while Niko was sound asleep cuddling with me on the couch. Very casually, I said, "huh...there is a squirrel". The second Niko heard "squirrel" she jumped up and ran to the slider - growling and barking at the squirrel. I thought she was going to break the glass she wanted it so bad :)
• This is Niko watching the squirrel ... wanting so bad to eat it :)

• And, last but most certainly not least - Kim made me the fantastic header you now see on my blog. It is wonderful and very cool of her to do.
  

So, that was my wonderful weekend - it SOOOO Sazzled :) Now, off to dinner and finishing my checklist. Perhaps I will accomplish one or 2 of the items before bed.